“There is a virus, a religious virus, circulating now called Wahhabism. It was founded in Mecca by a guy called Muhammad Iban Abd al-Wahhab in the mid 1700s. And it is really scary John. Fanatic. The sect preaches utter hatred of the Infidel. Unbelievers. Kafirs. Dhimmi. Us. The West. Us British especially. As we prosper we upstage the Muslim World and according to the Koran and Sharia Law only the Muslims are suppose to prosper. Their Prophet said only they would prosper and they would conquer the entire world and create a world Caliphate. A Muslim Empire conquering the entire world. Ruled from Constantinople, what they call Istanbul, but indirectly ruled of course in actuality from Mecca in Arabia.. A world dictatorship grinding all non Muslims under the heel of total submission. Convert or die.
All books that are not the Koran are to be burned. Not just the Bible. Dickens. Byron. Your Iliad. My Moby Dick. Chaucer. Tennyson. Shakespeare. Moliere. Pushkin. You name it. It is sin . It must be destroyed. All art is to be burned. The Mona Lisa. Rembrandt. Turner. Reynolds. Ancient Greece. Modern art. You name it. It is sin. It must be destroyed. All music is to be burned. Bach. Mozart. Beethoven. You name it. It is sin. It must be destroyed. All churches and temples. Ancient. Modern. The Pantheon. Westminster Abbey. You name it. It is a sin. It must be destroyed. All of the past before the Prophet. The pyramids of Egypt. Stonehenge. You name it. It is worthless. The past must be eradicated. All governments. All laws. Our Magna Carta is garbage to them. The Constitution of the United States of America. Anything created by ‘mere men’ is garbage. It is sin. It must be destroyed. Only the Koran and the Sharia Law is divine. All else must be destroyed. All science! All knowledge! Everything! Civilization as we know it John! As we know it! Must be destroyed and will be destroyed by these fanatics! They want to take the entire world back to the time of Mohammad! Make everyone live like savages! Like those ‘cavemen’ scientists are digging up!”
That is just a bunch of savages in some desert surely? Nutters who think the earth is flat and the sun obits the earth.”
Uncle Hogg shook his head. “It is a virus. It is very contagious John. It is spread all over the world by Muslim schools called madrasas. The Madrasa Rahimiyya at Delhi imported Wahhabism into India. They are mass producing fanatics the way we mass produce guns. It may come down to that. The fanatic Mughal ruler Aurangzeb financed Wahhabism into India. He was enraged that 3/4’s of India refused to convert even when he massacred them left, right, center, and behind. He felt it reflected on his religion. So he imported this religious virus into India.
There was this chap called Shah Wali Ullah. Graduate of that dreadful madrasa. He infected India with the Wahhabi Virus. His protégée was Abd al Aziz. As he watched the Muslim Ruling Caste become the Lost Caste while we prospered, and the Hindu and Sikh business caste prospered, he became so enraged. So he declared Hindustan, India, to be Dar ul Harab: Land Without Islam. Land of War. He declared a Holy Jihad against India. Jihad. Holy War. That is waving the triangular green flag of Holy War John. That flag John. War against us. And in any Dar ul Harab or Land Without Islam, Land of War, Jihad Holy War allows any crime, oath breaking, murder, terror, massacres, slavery, rape, rampage, anything John! Absolutely anything! Mohammad himself took among many victims of his Jihad Holy War a girl. He butchered her father, brothers, and husband before her very eyes and then he ‘married’ her, ordered her to convert or die, raped her, and then….well…. need we go into the graphic details of what happens to a woman at the hands of her conqueror who thinks in his supreme arrogance that she would actually love a man who waged brutal war, slaughtered every male in battle, then butchered her entire family?”
“But surely a few nutters can’t bring down ‘John Company’?”
“Only seven years ago a nutter called Syed Ahmad Barelvi, a disciple of Shah Wali Ullah launched Jihad Holy War in the Punjab, attacking no less than the Sikh Nation! They have the most advanced modern army in all of India! Better than us! He attacked One Eye Ranjit Singh the Maharajah of Lahore and the Leader of the Sikh Nation! He attacked Peshawar and Buner as well as Swat in Afghanistan to create a Wahhabi Super State!”
“I don’t remember reading about this?’
“We downplayed it. Singh and the Sikhs nailed his carcass to the wall. But the point is he called a Jihad and hundreds and hundreds of disgruntled Muslims of the Lost Caste joined his green flag of Jihad and fought! Hundreds! You are not talking about a few nutters John! You are talking about thousands of Muslims! He died in 1831 but his fanatical followers turned his corpse into a bloody shrine! A holy cave! The Cave of the Hidden Imam! And they raised thousands of rupees from dirt poor Muslims across India! Even the Punjab! Poor Pathans who could scarcely rub two coins together donated!”
“I don’t remember hearing about this!”
“Of course the Sikhs were enraged. They bellowed that next time they would kill any Muslim fanatic they would first shove pig down his throat and then sew the man into pigskin before hanging him in front of his followers to prevent such a damnable thing from happening ever again! Not just a martyr but a saint! Military Intelligence down in Calcutta was scared shitless!
Fortunately the Pathan Muslims are a tough lot. Pugnacious. They value their Code of Honor, their Blood Feuds, their personally chosen Leaders, their clans, their language, Loot, and their Religion absolutely equally. Always remember that John! One chap decided to check out the holy shine and he slithered up the mountain by moonlight and checked out the holy cave. He found a god damn goat carcass stuffed with grass graced with a carved wood head with yak hair! He dragged it down and threw it in front of everyone at dawn and the Holy Imams of the Hidden Imam made a really fast run for it! But the point is but for fortune, we would be knee deep in religious shit today!” Anyway! Unpack! Then we will have tea! —Oh. Don’t talk about this with anyone John. It is top secret. Hush! Hush! Whitehall stuff! Anyway! Off you go!”